Sunday, September 27, 2009

The "Re-brand Me" Series 4

Am I twisted?

You be the judge and jury.


My people cannot sleep at night and cannot relax by day. They cannot use ATM machines, not use cheques. My children sleep through staccato of AK 47s and see through the mist of tear gas. The leaders have looted everything on the ground and below. They walk the land with haughty strides and fly the skies with private jets. They have stolen the future of generations yet unborn and have money thay cannot spend in several lifetimes, but their brothers die of hunger. I want justice, please RE-BRAND ME.


I can produce anything, but import everything. So my toothpick is made in China; my toothpaste is made in South Africa; my salt is made in Ghana; my butter is made in Ireland; my milk is made in Holland; my shoe is made in Italy; my vegetable oil is made in Malaysia; my biscuit is made in Indonesia; my chocolate is made in Turkey and my table water made in France. My taste is far-flung and foreign, please RE-BRAND ME.

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

The "Re-brand Me" Series 3

Am I twisted?

You be the judge and jury.


I wanted change so I stood all day long to cast my vote. But even before I could vote, the results had been announced. When I dared to speak out, silence was enthroned by bullets. My rulers are my oppressors and my policemen are my terrors. I am ruled by men in "mufti", but I am not a democracy. I have no verve, no vote and no voice, please RE-BRAND ME.


I have 50 million youths with no jobs, no present and no future. So my sons in the North have become street urchins and his brothers in the South have become militants. My nephews die of thirst in the Sahara and his cousins drown in the waters of the Mediterranean. My daughters walk the streets of Lagos, Abuja and Port Harcourt, while her sisters parade the streets of Rome and Amsterdam. I am inconsolable, please RE-BRAND ME.

Sunday, September 20, 2009

The "Re-brand Me" Series 2

Am I twisted?

You be the judge and jury.


My school has no teacher and my classroom has no roof. I take lecture notes through the window and live with 15 others in a single room. All my professors have gone abroad, and the rest are awaiting visas. I am a university graduate, but I am illiterate. I want a future, please RE-BRAND ME.


Malaria, typhoid and many other preventable diseases send me to hospital which have no doctors, no medicines and no power. So, my wife gives birth with candlelight and surgery is performed by quacks. All the nurses have gone abroad and the rest are waiting to go also. I have the highest maternal and infant mortality rates in the world and future generations are dying before me. I am hopeless, hapless and helpless, please RE-BRAND ME.

Friday, September 18, 2009

The "Re-brand Me" Series 1

Am I twisted?

You be the judge and jury.



I have millions of arces of arable land and billions of cubic litres of water, but I cannot feed myself. So, I spend $1 billion to import rice and another $2 billion to import milk. I produce rice, but I don't eat it. I have 60 million cattle but no milk. I am hungry, please RE-BRAND ME.



I drive the latest cars in the world but have no roads. I lose family and friends everyday on roads for which funds have been looted. I lose my young, my old, and my most brainy and productive people to the potholes, craters and crevasses they travel on every day. I am in permanent mourning, please RE-BRAND ME.